In honor of my girlfriend who is pregnant with her first baby and her due date just weeks away, I want to discuss the state all pregnant women enter just before their baby is born. You’ve all heard the term “nesting,” which refers to the mommy-to-be preparing her nest/home for the arrival of her new baby. It sounds so sweet and beautiful, conjuring up images of folding onesies in the nursery or hanging a Dr. Seuss mobile over the crib. In reality, nesting will turn you into a bat shit crazy cleaner and organizer, tackling projects you never could have dreamed up before you were taken over by this powerful state.
The nesting instinct is so strong it will lead you to do unthinkable things, like carrying furniture that far outweighs the fifteen-pound weight limit you’re supposed to lift. We’re talking, carrying an entire couch on your back. You will be like a sherpa on Everest moving things about your house with little regard for the fact that your baby could arrive at any time. Or painting your kitchen cabinets by yourself at eight months pregnant, having the brown turn out to be purple and then being forced to repaint them all over again (well, your husband will have to repaint them). I’m speaking from experience when I say that pregnancy not only causes temporary insanity, but temporary color blindness as well. Is breathing paint fumes and heavy lifting a good idea when you’re pregnant? No. You will want to do some crazy shit when you’re nesting, so make sure to keep yourself in check so you don’t hurt yourself or your baby.
A few logical things to do while nesting are to clean the nursery and stock up on supplies. For example, toilet paper, paper towel, wipes and diapers. No amount of these items will be considered over the top. I would say 1000 of each would be a good starting point…Hello Costco! Also, take the tags off your new baby gear and wash all of the baby’s clothes. Finally, finish up any home improvement projects you hope to actually complete in the next decade.
Although any pregnant woman reading this post will take my suggestions to heart, nothing will be able to contain her need to prep, organize and clean before her baby arrives. The power of the nesting instinct is equal to that of a Meth-Head in search of their next high. Incessant list making, frozen meal prep and nursery organization are all signs that the nesting instinct has fully set in. Even though your beautiful nursery is soon to be covered in poop and spit up and after one diaper change you won’t require that list of supplies, if it makes an expecting mom feel just a bit more prepared for her new baby I say, “Game on!”